It can be difficult to understand why the children from the first marriage receive the financial support while the children from the 2nd marriage go without.  Things like braces, child care, sporting activites all come under the heading “special expenses” and these expenses are to be shared by both partents proportionately in income.  Although a difficult pill to swallow at times, remember that the children have no control on what a parent does and does not do so although the mother quit her job it still does not change the need for the children to have braces.  It is important not to resent the children.   Depending on the mother’s situation i.e. did she quit her job and does not plan on getting a new one or did she quit her job and is actively looking for something else – adjustments to the special expenses can be negotiated when she is in a better financial position.  For instance, if/when she gets another job she contribute more for the children’s sporting activity to off set the fact that your partner paid 100% for the braces.  Situations always are changing and it is a good thing when ex spouses can be flexible. 

Family mediation is an exceptional process for couples or families who want to resolve their differences.  The key word here is WANT.  Those who go through the process with their own agenda that does not include resolving the issues of course will not get much out of Mediation.

Mediation is a voluntary process that all parties including the Mediation can decide to quit at any time.  This does happen and should if it becomes clear to anyone that not all the parties are there to provide full disclosure with the intent on settling the issues.

If you have gone through a mediation to settle a family dispute or to assist with a separation or divorce – what was your experience?  Did all the issues get resolved or a least some of them?